A Good Plan

 Settle down, it'll all be clear
Don't pay no mind to the demons
They fill you with fear
The trouble it might drag you down
If you get lost, you can always be found

These song lyrics have become an anthem for me these days. Every time I hear this song, I remember to breathe. I like what Phil is saying, trying to show us that all we need to do is relax… I get that. 

I just can’t do that...very well.

I like planning so much I bought a second agenda. I like knowing. I love writing in dates with colorful pens. In third grade my teacher had us pick out our favorite quotes. She must have thought I was quite a sight, getting up before the class…and I’m not talking about my obscene love for butterfly clips. My predecessors had quotes from the latest Power Rangers episode, familiar spice girl’s lyrics, and as for me? I read my speech about Sir Francis Bacon and ended with my favorite quote, “Knowledge is power.”

I got an A on the presentation, but also a meeting with my teacher about what the quote meant. I’m pretty sure she thinks my parents put me up to it. Little did I know it was a combination of my inner nerd and my need to know. I fell madly in love in third grade with the idea that the more you know, both worldly and intimate, the more you can offer the world, and the greater legacy you leave.  I have, like many of my classmates grown up in a community where being average was acceptable, but above average was desirable. Being above average and having a plan on how to get there… that was my idea of a gold star at the end of the day.

They say that God gives you the same struggle until you overcome it. And I think the big guy is trying to show me when and where I need to let go. I have always been a Type A personality, that’s not going anywhere. But to live in the moment and not to plan everything? Not to know everything? This is a struggle for me. The worst part is that I’m up against my biggest rival…myself.

We all grow up with a plan, whether we make it or society presents it to us, there is a plan constantly in front of us.  The thing no one ever told me about my plans is that one day they will change. One day I’m going to wake up and scratch some things out, reschedule a lot, and add even more. So, I’m starting to write more and more with my mechanical pink pencil. Because sometimes I’m going to have to erase and sometimes I’m going to have to draw some arrows to another day. 

I’m learning that while I love a good plan… I love life’s surprises even more.




#NFF (Not for Facebook)

I've been noticing a lot lately that there has been a ton of hate on the usage of the almighty hashtag via fb. This got me thinking. Are there really things is this world that we shouldn't publicize? And is it truly the downfall of social media ettiquette to implant a hastag in the fb world?  Well friends... I mulled over this on my run today. And I'm still gonna use the hashtag, but here are some things that are truly #NFF... Not for Facebook:

1.  Announcing your single. You go girl, you have my support. But really? Make a guy work for it.
2.  Pictures of everything you do in a day. I'm waiting for the day when I see someone on the toilet.
3.  Announcing you're getting drunk.
4.  Tagged photos of yourself where you don't look amazing. Untagging isn't a privilege. It's a right.
5.  Marilyn Monroe quotes. #totesfiveminutesago
6.  Secrets. Or alluding to having a secret. OR having a status about someone and we all know it's about someone. We get it. You & a pal are having issues. Call them.
7.  Debbie Downers. We all have bad days. Tweet about it.
8.  That photo of you doing a beer bong. And then making it your cover photo. #unemployment
9.  If your relationship is a dram fest... maybe use the private message option? Or not. We all have those fb pals that belong on Days of Our Lives.
10. Apps that tell you whose viewed your profile. #ignoranceisbliss
11. Sad lyrics as your status. #cryforhelp
12. Self shot mirror photos.  Put that trash on myspace.
13. Political tirades... half my fb friends are running for President.
14. Emoticon overload. Pick one emotion. Not twelve.
15. "Let me know how you feel about me" OR "Leave a memory about you and I" OR "Truth is"
16. Announcing you're unfriending people. Newsflash: no one cares.
17. If you're with someone, talk to them. Posts like "Oh hey I'm right next to you" make me wonder... did you lose your ability to speak?
18.  Bragging about yourself. Show us, don't TELL us how awesome you are. #instagramit
19.  Checking into your own home. There are no words here.

and last but not least

20. Hashtags #butimstillgonnauseit ;)

Come on friends, let's put the fun back in facebook.




Falling into Fall

One thing I miss about college? Shopping for the back to school debut. You know the moment. You're back from summer and you're looking the best. In those first three months of being back at the grind, you're still all about the gym with your 5 times a week workouts at 5 am. Your munch of choice? The ripe delicious raspberries you just picked up from the farmers market. You're lookin good friend. Plus it doesn't hurt that you just bought a whole new fall wardrobe, full of a great transitional trench coat and riding boots that make your walk look like you're strutting down the runway. You are, overall, back in action. Back to school is the commoner's comeback. 

And then fall sets in. Your riding boots have faded from the rich whiskey color they once were and getting up at 5 am to work out sounds about as awful as the cookies you had for dinner. So, begrudgingly we fall into fall and the summer glow fades. This fall however, I am challenging myself and my mindset. Fall fashions are ironically the ones that require a fit form and can provide the catalyst for a styling evolution.  Although college is now a whole year in my history, I still look to fall as the movie that's worth buying tickets for the midnight show. In my personal life I acknowledge that I have chosen to live summer to summer. After all, despite our culture we all have our ways of marking the years that fly by. We walk through life as individuals on distinct platforms. Some see minutes as moments, and others see hours by years. And yet when fall rolls around, it is a universal coin flip where fate waves hello. 

For myself, I am approaching fall with one thing on my mind, myself and riding boots. I say "myself" because, although this is not a "back to school" fall for me, it is in the sense that life has become my greatest and most difficult class. And this fall, hopefully while wearing a pair of riding boots that fit over my calves, I can return for what I think will be a year of monumental lessons.  It's funny how at the age of 22 we're still invincible and so childish. And then 23 presents itself as the reality check we were  trying to avoid. But I remain steadfast in my excitement. And I'm encouraged by the inspiration that has drawn me back to writing more often. My blog will begin to adopt more structure which hopfully will be mirrored in my life as well. But who knows? 

When falling into fall, we never quite know where we'll land.